the atlantic was born today and i'll tell you how . . . the clouds above opened up and let it out.

This is a vague disclaimer paragraph. Today I'm going to talk about sex. Well, not really sex. I sort of lack experience in that arena. But I'm going to talk about nude self-portraits (an admittedly sexual subject). Primarily those made in response to the thought "How little we know about our bodies!" So. If that sort of art makes you squeamish, you can stop reading. The End.

I sat in the library today, checking through a bunch of photography periodicals (because I am totally uncertain about my senior show, and I really want inspiration), and it struck me:

It makes sense that people want to do nude self-portraits (one woman even did nude portraits with herself and her entire family for a year, in a domestic context. They just walked around naked together). It's weird, sure, and I'm still not sure I agree with publishing those sorts of pictures ("those sorts" being the naked kind in general), but OK. I understand.

It's like this: we see our faces in the mirror every day, and they eventually become familiar.

[Although we don't ever see them in motion, so, for me at least, it's always surprising to see photographs of myself. Do I really make faces like that? And we never see profiles, or the back of our heads, or our posture - we only see the face straight on. And mirrors themselves are distorted! They reverse what we see. So actually, we have no idea what we look like, even when we think we do. No lie, poets can really say "I know the face of my lover better than I know my own" and it's not even that profound of a statement. Heck, you probably know the face of your cranky elderly neighbor better than your own.]

Our bodies? We don't even get to see them in a distorting context like the mirror every day. At least I don't. Maybe some of you take naked nap-time or something, so you see yourselves in the mirror every day when you get up. (Who knows. People have weirder habits than naked nap-time.)

So visually-oriented people, like artists, in the course of becoming interested in our identities, what makes us, who we are, all that jazz, begin to feel like we should know the visual properties of our own bodies. If anyone is familiar with the way our bodies look, it should be us (we're the artists, after all). If we've made peace with the landscape of our minds and our vision, then why should we not also make peace and claim familiarity with our bodies (such simple physical matter)? And why should we not, by visually interpreting our bodies, claim and interpret those physical needs which in part define us? I'm talking about things like hunger, thirst, the need for sleep.

Also I think this: taking nude self-portraits is part of reconciling with oneself as a sexual being. All of us are, in fact, made to have sex, whether we ever do or not. And how can anyone else be involved in that if we don't even know how it works? How can someone come to any kind of physical mutuality with anyone else if he/she doesn't even understand the way our bodies look, let alone beginning to understand the way they react (or don't react) to sexual stimulus? So, many artists take nude self-portraits (some more obviously sexually charged than others).

Does that make sense? I tried to articulate that in the least confusing way possible. But I'm not positive I got it right. Anything which is unclear?

I'll say this as a sort of additional disclaimer: in exploring questions of identity, I think there may be other metaphors that would sneak up on people better (and hence make more of an impact, make them think more about the subject) than the shock value of "nekkid pitchers." Not in all cases, but in the vast majority, I think that nude self-portraits could be avoided. I'll admit there are a few places when the naked body can be used to great effect as a metaphor for something else, as well. (Complicated philosophy, I know. But if you think about it, it sort of makes sense. The shock prompted by nude photographs is great when transferred to other subjects, but it gets in the way of itself if you want people to actually think about the naked body. The naked female, especially, is a politically charged thing.)

But you know, I sort of understand why artists make nude self-portraits/portraits now. So I thought I would share, since I lack insight most of the time. Even though sharing might be considered vaguely controversial/awkward.

What, Mackenzie bring up an awkward subject? Heaven forbid. =D (Greg, if he's reading this, is probably laughing hysterically. We have the most awkward conversations ever. I think I lack an inner censor.)