So....

I... don't really hate anyone anymore.

Today I hated everyone, and the entire world, and wished God had never made humans, especially not me. I tried repeating the mantra, "I'm OK with it, I'm at peace...." but that didn't work. Then I tried repeating the mantra, "I'm not here right now, I'm not here right now," but that didn't produce results either. I eventually tried both "I will not kill anyone, I will not kill anyone, I am a pacifist" and "go away, leave me alone, don't speak to me, don't look at me, don't touch me. Go away, leave me alone." None of those had the desired effect - first choice being the sudden implosion of every single human being on the planet, and second choice being the sudden appearance of a soundproof, sightproof, and entranceproof room in which I was completely enclosed, perhaps with some soothing music, or better yet, complete silence.

Then I went to the quiz meet, entirely against my will I might add, and somehow.... it was just all better. Abbi was there, and it was really good to see her again, and all those cute little B quizzers that for some inexplicable reason like me.... Yeah. I dunno. I'm not particularly happy with the South in general still, but I don't hate the whole world now.... So yeah, it's all cool, and I really am at peace with it.

Thank you all for listening to this long and rambling... thing. And for not biting my head off for biting yours off yesterday. I really am tired of being mocked and made fun of, but I can handle it, because I love you guys, and whatever you throw at me has got to be good in the long run right?